And we're back! Despite having not posted anything in approximately 3 years, this blog appears to still be getting 300-400 hits a week. Thats' 299-399 more hits a week than I thought it would get. Where have I been? You don't care. Only 10% of you were dropping by regularly according to Google Analytics. Email me if you really give a fuck (*crickets chirping*). Lots of good topics to discuss. Or at least for me to rant about and for you to attack. I plan on smashing Port Authority a bit more-they managed to go more downhill than the last time I wrote about them. Also, random bitching about Pittsburgh Gyms, Pittsburgh Tunnel Driving, and all sorts of fun. Fun fun fun til daddy takes the t-bird away. Sad that some yinzers still drive t-birds.

I love these guys

If the world just had more teacup piggies, everything would be alright and everyone would be happy. Even Gravis.

Port Authority Clowns at it again

Well, the Port Authority assholes are at it again. Today, a story in the Post Gazette shows that some drivers hit an all time low. They printed up fliers, without the permission of the Port Authority, and tried to SCARE a bunch of passengers with a bunch of bullshit warning them their lines would be cancelled. The worst part is that in some cases, they blatently LIED.

One false charge made in a brochure was that "mass transit in Oakmont and Verona is being eliminated," according to Jim Ritchie, spokesman for the Port Authority.

Many of the drivers are truly the bottom of the barrel. By far the most hateful letters I get are from these dildos. They are the most defensive, useless people ever. They do what they want on the road. Here's an example:

I pull over to drop someone off. Cars pass me and I wait my turn to re-enter, AS I SHOULD BECAUSE I AM NOT SPECIAL AND DON'T DESERVE TO GET BACK IN IMMEDIATELY WHEN IT SUITS ME.

But for bus drivers, well NOOOOOO. Half the time they don't even pull over, when they are SUPPOSED TO. Then when they do, AS SOON as their folks are dropped off, they push their douchebag buses back into traffic. On a few occasions, they almost crush people's cars to do so. Instead of waiting patiently to re-enter traffic, they just weave in and out.

I have seriously considered picking up a cheap video camera and when I run into one of these fuckheads weaving in and out like bullies, just following them and taping them and posting it so their boss (and the people they try to convince that they are so great and worthy) can see it.

I could bitch about these dicknoses all day, but who'd listen? Hopefully the Port Authority will fire these clowns. By the way, if there is an underutilized route, why should we pay for it?? Let the people using the bus pick up the tab, and if there aren't enough people using it, how the fuck is that our problem? You get a smaller bus or no bus at all. Your problem, not ours.

THIS IS SO FUCKIN SIMPLE, WATCH THIS!!! Lets say a bus costs $100 to operate including the profit they want to make (to make it simple for math dummies). You have an area where the buses are packed, 100 people a day. Each pays a dollar. Now you have another area where only 20 people use it. They should pay $5. That is life, you got unlucky living somewhere where people don't use the bus. Don't ask the people who live where the 100 people utilize the bus pick up the tab for the skimpy bus area. Or expect route cuts and bus drivers stuck doing the jobs they deserve at the prices they deserve.

Welcome G-20! And protestors, go fuck yourselves!

Well, the G-20 clowns are moving into Pittsburgh. Oh, and those clowns include both the attenders of the summit, and the protestors. For the attenders, I just have one suggestion: Go have your summit on a boat, in the middle of the sea. All the countries can pay for a navy defense (yeah, even you too, Canada, with your no navy ass) and you can move wherever you want about the sea, or to a small island, and out of everyone's hair. What does it prove?

And then there are the protestors. What a bunch of shitbags and losers. I mean, if you want to find a bigger group of jobless scumbags with stupid philosophies (outside of Berkeley, California that is), just check out our town over the next few days. If the losers of the world could hold a convention of their own (provided they had the money to hold it anywhere decent, which they don't) it will be in Pittsburgh. Lets look at the winners highlighting this group of assholes:

Code Pink: Old pigs protesting war. War protests are boring now. Bush is gone. Obama will never end the wars, so get over it and get back to your lives. By the way, I love that the husband of the local leader of this group of cunts is a staunch republican.

Thomas Merton Center: Think Patchouli and shit mixed up in one exciting package. Thats what you see when this group marches. What a bunch of rectums.

Three Rivers Climate Convergence: Manmade global warming chumps (see gullible clowns) who want us to live in the 1930s again technologically (but sure as shit not morally.) They are much more reasonable than other protestors, but their agenda is still stupid. Everytime they do something that sets us back in time, we should counter protest. Go buy a generator and a tank full of gas and crank it up to put some extra CO2 in the atmosphere to offset their change. Why? No fuckin good reason, just like there is no good reason to go protest because no one listens to you but yourselves, dumbasses.

Pittsburgh Organizing Group: Think Che, but not the cool Che that these commies love. Think Che like the piece of shit Che is. These will likely be the cowards wearing masks, and looking AIDSesque. They love using the word anarchy like its SOOO great, but really they don't know dick. As soon as lawlessness sets in, real men and women (and now criminals) will be out with guns and weapons and these pussies will be crying in the mud somewhere. Their like that kid who acts like a badass when there are people around to protect them, but when they get suddenly punched in the face, they don't fight back, they cry and say, "What the fuck man!?!??!" Complete pussies.

The list goes on and on. Some of these groups will be out breaking windows, trashing property, etc. Why can't we do anything? Why doesn't Ravendick and his chronies make a simple law. On that week, any property crime IS A FELONY. Just that week. If you are filmed destroying property or hurting police, you will go to jail for a very uncomfortable stay. You will also have a felony on your record. You will see 95% of these problems clear up after one year of the horrible stories. When you get locked up with other losers, it doesn't matter...but when you get locked up with Luis, head of Los Pepes, in a prison cell, you'll think hmmm, maybe next year I'll do something productive....like work.

Come to our neighborhood and protest, and walk on our property. You'll meet our friend, a jolly wooden fellow nice Easton printed on it.

Time to come back...

Well, its been two years of hiatus. Whats new with me? You don't give a fuck. I haven't been in prison, nor have I have been in a mental hospital, though its damn obvious you'd want me there, I know.

I can't say I am any more tame. Angrier, is probably a better word. We went from one dumbass president that at least had a set of balls to another dumbass president with the balls of a 15th century Catholic Choir boy. PA government has gotten worse. And even better...WE HAVE THE FUCKIN G-20 HERE IN A WEEK! What a dumbass decision...so much to blog, so little time. Ok, expect great new topics from me including:

-My new law for old hard-ons and asians driving across bridges and through tunnels
-Want to save the environment? Fix the fuckin red lights to save some fuel burning!
-More on my hatred for American Cars (the hate mail is strong with that post) and now how they are run by the government
-Why the Pittsburgh Left Turn is the GREATEST invention known to man (stop whining about it LA rectums)
-Lots of Pittsburgh issues

Expect angrier. Expect more upfront. And expect me to take it like I dish it out. I went back through my email and posted EVERY hateful message. I am not a pussy, and I plan to respond thoroughly to each and everyone of your posts, including you union worthless, bus driving morons, and douchebags.

Actually there was one post that was so hateful, I just couldn't put it up because it was pretty racist. I am the least PC guy in the world, but there's no great reason to ever call anyone a n@@ger. There are so many other derogatory terms for people that I find acceptable, try and stick to one of those, or expect your words to be lost in the aether.

Love you all. Except Ravenworthless.

Road Closures at Rediculous Levels in Pittsburgh

Yet again, roads are closed everywhere in Pittsburgh. Tunnels like the Squirrel Hill are continuously closed on the weekends leading to massive traffic tie ups. I mean just look at all the closures on the contruction round up page. WHen the fuck is the I-79 work going to be done? I have been driving down to Morgantown for several years and I feel like it just never ends. How long does it take for you construction fuckheads to get this done? Are these Union bums who can only for 5 hours out of an 8 hour day, and overtime costs tax payers an arm and a leg??????

Here are VERY simple solutions to fix these problems if someone in this city/county/state had some cojones:

1) Don't hire union labor. The unions did their job and got rid of greedy folks who wanted more money then they needed (if you believe all that socialist bullshit). Let them picket. Let them whine. Hell they don't even picket themselves some of them are so lazy, they use union dues to hire college kids and bums who do it for them. With teams that can work around the clock, these jobs will be done in no time.

2) Start hiring based on quality, not on lowest bid. Get bids based on "road quality guarantee". That is, first, if the road goes to shit, the contractor will have to pay their own time and money later to repair it, PLUS pay for inspection to insure it will last this time PLUS be liable if the city decides they suck and wants to hire someone else to do it. If they can't do it right, their company should have to pay someone who can...why should we???

3) Hire based on time time. Say, we'll pay you this much, and you don't get paid until its done on time. If its not done, not only does the amount you get begin to drop, but you start picking up your own bill. Again, you will have a choice: get rid of workers who can't work around the clock for decent workers or lose money.

I'd like to hear more ideas on this, so get em out there. How else can we fix this "quagmire" of paying for shitty quality? Bring the power back into our hands and use the free market as well as ambition to drive building, and we can't go wrong.

Fire in the Hole! Hilareous new prank on Fast Food Losers

Check out this new prank that is happening around the country. In my opinion its hilareous, especially since fast food people are always miserable and fuck up orders (except at Chic-Fil-a where I must admit they never make mistakes and the food is usually pretty fresh.) If you DON'T Laugh at this, you are probably a jagoff and you probably won't like anything in my blog, so go fuck yourself and go back to your faggity PETA or global warming blogs.

Coming back soon...

Hey everyone,

Its been a while, but I will shortly be returning after some major changes in real life to continue the blogging. Basically in 2 short months I have:

-Finished an old Masters
-Worked on a new bachelors
-Promoted to Middle Management in my company which has doubled my workload

The blog had to take a break. I am impressed to see I still get hits despite not posting for nearly two months, and they still approach triple digit numbers!!!!!!!!!

I have plenty of stuff to bitch about including Ravenfucknut our useless mayor, more poorly run construction (if I ran jobs like that I would be shitcanned right now), drink taxes (as if we aren't taxed enough, greedy politicians want more,) etc.

See you VERY soon.

Illegal Immigrants making their way into Pittsburgh

Have you heard this story? Probably not because the stupid liberal whiny douchebags that write for newspapers feel guilty for it. Police picked up 6 illegals on our OWN PARKWAY.

Now why even post this? Well, it speaks to a multitude of problems. First, the next time your neighbor is collecting an unemployment check because his blue collar work ends for the summer and he gets temporarily laid off, well, here is a PERFECT job he could do in the meantime. Laying cable is just as honorable as running a business or teaching, and this is a job that should have been available, and frankly forced on, people in our country who don't want to work or take advantage of "laid off" time or welfare time. Guess what that means for you when people off welfare have to work? Less tax money taken out of your check.

Second of all, doesn't Verizon do checks on their subcontractors? When their cable is being laid and none of the guys speak English, isn't that troublesome?? If you are smart, you will mention your disgust to Verizon about who they keep company with.

And stop all this shit about "well were your grandparents born in this country?" No they weren't and frankly that was then and this is now and I don't give a shit. If you believe in that, let's just let everyone in, so they can suck up jobs, take handouts from the government and just drain our system dry like the old hard-ons did to that pool in the movie Cocoon. Plus my grandparents saved up for years and got the authorization to come here. They didn't sneak in when they weren't welcome.

Nobody's parents were born here except maybe the Indians, and don't give me that bullshit about this being their land. Ever see that movie Last of The Mohicans? Those fuckin savages!

Viva la Pittsburgh!

Good Riddance Port Authority Routes and Dickhead Drivers

Pittsburgh Port Authority bus drivers are the worst. They are aggresive cocksuckers. That is a blog for another day, and we'll save that for the next time I have an incident with one of these dildos.

If you haven't been living under a rock, Port Authority is making cuts to its routes. People are up in arms and there are protests and all kinds of shit! Chicken Little, the sky is falling!!!

I say, fuck 'em. Here's a few good reasons:
-How many times have you passed a bus in the evening and seen 2 people on that huge bus. And I am not talking on the outskirts of town, but rather where the main route of the bus is supposed to get people. Do you realize we are picking up a huge bill for those 2 morons?
-Cars are fucking cheap. I know some people are poor, I KNOW. But we are getting into an age where things are too spread out to rely on buses. The only places buses should run are places like Oakland and Downtown where parking is not free.
-Why the FUCK should I pay for your bus when I never need to use it? It should be your problem. If they need to hike rates because you need it, again, YOU SHOULD PAY THOSE. It is the price you pay for not having a car. If your rate is 3 bucks a ride, tough shit. This isn't socialism and this isn't like roads and school systems that everyone use. Only some people use the bus. So, only those SOME people should pay for it. I don't ask you to pay for my internet even when you don't have it, and you shouldn't ask me.

Bus drivers are overpaid, undertalented assholes. Any moron can do that job. Literally ANYONE who can drive can use a bus. This isn't a teaching job, or a tough blue collar job like construction. You sit in a temperature controlled bus everyday and the worst thing that happens is a smelly passenger, an argument, or the occasional police call.

You choose to live where you want. This is America. If there is no bus where you live, then move. This isn't medieval times where you are tied to your land like a vassal, asshole.

Gym Etiquette for Yinzers, Part 2-For Gym Users and Steroid Heads

Here is part two of my thrilling gym ettiquete installment:

Here are some tips for gym users:
-There is NO NEED TO BE NAKED in the locker room more than a minute to change clothes. Why do you have to walk around naked? Recently at the gym, this young guy talked on his cell phone, naked, for about 15 minutes, periodically staring down at his balls, and then the mirror. That boggles my mind-do you want to bang yourself? This isn't a 1950's gym class, or the army. Put your clothes on. Just because some hag told you that you had a great knob 20 years ago doesn't mean the rest of us give a shit. And old guys, WOW do you have pathetically small dicks. I thought I was small...

-Clean off the machine when you're done. That's why those spray bottles are all around. See that slimy patch where your head was? Clean it up. And stop sweating already for fuck's sake.

-Stop bullshitting and lift weights, especially if you are holding up the only Smith Machine in the joint. I have shit to do and so do others, so if you want to talk on the phone, go grab your cell and head out the door. I know you steroids love talking about your workouts, but I don't have time for that shit.

-Don't scream when you lift. I understand there is grunting involved, especially when you are pressing, but you aren't Schwartzenegger, or even close to being a professional. No need to bang weights either, for that matter.

-The water fountain is meant for SHORT drinks. See that line behind you? Stop filling your water bottle for 5 minutes asshole. If you are filling and see someone behind you, move out of the way.

-Quit using multiple machines fucko. Maybe the "hot" workout thing is supersetting, but it wastes valuable space and everyone else's time.

-Don't use your cell phone IN the gym. Can't you walk outside or to the locker room?

-Fat people...stop wasting your time. The first step to weight loss is to STOP EATING!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can make this article about 10 times longer, but I think these are great action steps for losers who use the gym for recreation like others use clubs, bars or vaginas.

Gym Etiquette for Yinzers-Part 1

I know how much yinzers love their exercise. Here is a two part series about how to make our gyms more inviting, starting with better management.

Here are some tips for gym owners and employees:
-Say hello to me when I come in. If you go to any other business, you are greeted warmly. Every gym I go to has lukewarm staff. Nothing annoys us more when the workers who are human steroids pair up with other human steroids and clique off, making you feel like a douche if you can't bench 300 lbs. Just SMILE AND SAY HELLO when I come in. That is ALL I ask.
-Set the weights back with other weights and straighten the place up at night.
-Fix the equipment. Every fuckin gym has so much broken shit, from broken chairs to fucked up pulleys. It can't be that expensive, and when you sold me the membership, that is what was sold to me. If I wanted to be flaky with my membership, you would tell me to pound salt into my asshole and then threaten to take me to court for not paying, we should expect the same from you.
-Temperature is ALWAYS a problem in those places. A gym should be almost freezing. If my prick hasn't shrunk to the size of a grape, its not cold enough. Get a new AC unit, because I deserve it with the prices I am paying.
-You can never have too many machines. Go buy more.

Next time: Douchebag behavior at the gym by gym members...

The Hill District- A Symbol of Blight

This is an amazing link of sites that a friend of mine sent to me. Basically, these folks live in about the shittiest area in Pittsburgh (Hill District) and are trying to live a normal life despite crackheads, homeless, and pieces of shit. Instead of moving like most of us would do, these folks have put up cameras and are actively attacking the pieces of garbage who frequent a local crack house, loiter around property, and make their life hell.

I invite you to take a look at this video and ask yourself: Why can't they get the Hill area into shape? Is it really that hard? They continue to sink more and more money into the Hill and it continues to be shitty, crime ridden, and a waste of our money as taxpayers. Ever drive through there at noon? If its warm, there are 40-50 people just hanging out around, doing nothing? Why don't you assholes have jobs?

We continue to dump money into these shitholes when what we should be doing is turning this prime real estate into what it is: Prime real estate and more tax money, instead of paying for many of these folks to live for free. Ravendouchebag and the council of clowns will never get that. Housing subsidies increase in places like "The Hill", but how did folks in the depression who lived in a time of no government assistance not only live through being broke but also improved their lives? If they can do it, the vast majority of folks in our poorer areas can do the same.

Look at this video and shitbags that not only own this home, but the assholes who frequent it. These webmasters are doing the right thing by filming and keeping the eye on these bums, and I hope we dump the garbage that frequents these crack houses where the belong...in the sewer.

Here is an additional fun page, albeit tough to read:

http://neighbors.pitas.com/

Do you need to wear your scrubs EVERYWHERE?

Walk around Oakland and you will see numerous people walking around in scrubs. Already stupid, but even worse, they wear their scrubs EVERYWHERE. Going to dinner? Their scrubs are on. Shopping? Their scrubs are on. Working out? Their scrubs are on. Can't you fuckin change before you leave the hospital? Aren't there locker rooms?

The fact is that you are working a field where you come into constant contamination every fucking hour of every fucking day. Can you do the city a favor and change those things before you spread bacteria and coughed up shit everywhere?

Worse yet, you can potentially contaminate your patients. Stop being a lazy inconsiderate asshole and change your fuckin clothes.

Same with Doctors and their lab coats. Can't you leave your stupid coat somewhere? I know you are a doctor. I know that you are smarter than me. I know that you drive a nicer car than I do. Do you really need to wear your coughed on, shitty coat everywhere? I don't think so. Leave it and your stethoscope and your show-off attitude in the office where it belongs. You don't see me wearing my uniform everywhere!



And honestly you have to be a lifeless jackoff to build an entire wikipedia article to scrubs.

The U.S. (and Pittsburgh)-a bunch of pussies

I'm out for a bachelor party this weekend.

This blog below sums it up more eloquently than my uneducated ass can. The next time you ride through the park and see the douche with the blinking light and headlight on his bike (pussy) or the swarm of crossing guards in your suburban neighborhood with narry a car to be seen...The next time you have to find a tricky route home because they lower the alcohol level to .02 and you can't even drive after you have a sip of beer, and get stopped by the drunk driving patrol with their 'papers please' nazi germany approach...or someone calls you a nappy headed ho and you have to protest because the reality is just like to stir up trouble(HUGE wimps), remember the blog below.

Have a great week.

When did America Become a Nation of Frightened Wimps

Chances are your bumper sticker makes your look like a jagoff. Part 1

I was surprised to see my worthless little blog being featured as one of the blogs on the City Paper Website. Thanks to a few posts by individuals around other blogs and sites, the views have grown exponentially. Thank you to the fans out there, I know I am not the only one annoyed at some of the silly shit in this city.

If you like an article on here, please paste the link to the article on a forum somewhere, especially if it will piss off someone. My recent article about the Pirates was posted on a few forums and got hits, but I was shocked that no one sent me a nasty email or a post. Maybe many agree with me? I would like to hope, but probably not.

In a perhaps vain effort to get some interactivity going, I'd like to start the occasional 'bumper stickers' entry. That is, find bumper stickers that you think are gay beyond belief, post them to the discussion forum or send me an email and we can get it out there. As we decide which are best, we can go from there.

For my first entry on this topic, who thinks that these stickers are unbelievably annoying??



I see variations of them with this stupid kid pissing on a Ford logo or a Chevy Logo, or whatever. There is nothing cooler than kids doing watersports. If you have one of these stickers on your MOPAR, you are a jagoff, 1000%. Even gayer, you have THIS sticker to counter it:



I am annoyed by Greasemonkeys in general, but I'll save that for another entry. This is among one of the stupidest stickers out there, and you are embarrASSing yourself by placing it on a vehicle. Even it covers the most wretched rust spot, it is still worse.

Coincidentally, I own a "riceburner" and an "American" car and I can tell you the riceburner is 1000x more reliable than the shit coming out of Mexico, I mean Detroit.

Hope to hear about some of your favorites. Post them or email me at gravis187@yahoo.com.

Easy Fix to Make the Pittsburgh Pirates Better...

Want to make the Pittsburgh Pirates better? It's easy. Until they start winning, STOP GOING TO THE FUCKIN GAMES!!!!!!!

Here is the scenerio. You shop at Target, for example. I have NO problem with Target, this is purely an example. You go there and something really shitty happens. Everytime you buy something from there, its fucked up, the service sucks, employees are rude, whatever. If you went to target once, and had great experiences, you won't complain at that one shit experience. Maybe twice. But what if Target fucked you FOURTEEN TIMES. Would you still shop there? NO. SO WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU WASTE YOUR TIME WATCHING A TEAM WITH 14 LOSING SEASONS????

The latest in a string of articles talks about them trying to be media darlings, and how with good feeling they'll break 500. What a load of shit. And don't give me this loyalty bullshit. You wouldn't be loyal to ANYONE who let you down 14 times. The Pirates should be no different.

Instead you get that sports lovin' jackass who would watch Kangaroo boxing if it was popular, and that stupid bitch who likes going to the games because they're fun. Stupid. You continue to pay, they continue to make money and nothing changes, including the whining at how much they suck, and the perpetual, "WOW, they may break 500 this year?" Yeah, and I may grow a third penis. Err second.

Here is my solution, since obviously what they have tried hasn't worked in 14 years. No matter how much you love baseball, no matter how much you like watching the game on the TV, boycott them. Don't go to games, don't click on their channel, don't put them on the radio. Let them know why you won't see them, and DON'T PUSSY OUT WHEN THEY THREATEN TO SELL THE TEAM. THEY WILL NEVER EVER EVER SELL THAT TEAM ANYWHERE.

If you did this to Target, guess what? The owners would realize the disgust of the customers, and spend money and time investing in being the best. On the contrary, if you continued to shop at Target, and they sucked but made money, they have less impetus to change.

Hit that piece of shit Kevin McClatchy, owner and stingy cocksucker where it hurts. He will be forced to spend more on the team, and in the long run, that suffering year or two without baseball may payoff to a lifetime franchise of fun.

This is perhaps the best analogy ever, and I am proud and I hope it reaches men and women alike. You can substitute Target for your favorite store, like Frederick's of Hollywood or your local porn shop.

More traffic...

As if there isn't enough traffic between the neverending job on the Homestead Bridge, and the construction on the Parkway East, wait there's more!

Now you can expect monstrous delays on the Boulevard of the Allies and the Birmingham Bridge.

Can someone tell me, are there like 10 Penndots that don't really talk to each other except through The Force??? How does the average human being consider the following: Boulevard of the Allies is a way in and out of Oakland. The Birmingham Bridge is a way in and out of Oakland. The Bates Street ramp is a way in and out of Oakland. Let's close roads off to an already congested area of the city not just one way, BUT THREE. I don't give a fuck if its the weekend or evening or whatever, it is still an inconvenience for the folks that work and live there. Why didn't someone say, hey, lets do one thing at a time and be considerate of the folks that live there. I won't say why it wasn't thought of, but it has something to do with the conjuction of one's head and one's own asshole.

In one of the articles about this pinnacle of stupidity, Dan Cessna says, "This will be a challenging year for motorists as they travel through out the region." You think so Dan??? You are a fuckin genius man. Thanks for showing the rapid decline of both print press at the Post Gazette and the average IQ at Penndot.

It defies logic, and shows you that any fuckhead can work for Penndot. Don't worry if you are a moron and have the common sense of Lemming , as long as you know somebody and can do something stupid, you can work for Penndot.

Here is the Wikipedia entry for common sense. Penndot folks, please begin your research here.

Why press the walk button when you're crossing anyway?

If you're not one of those assblades that has to bike or walk everywhere (aka you are too poor to afford a car, don't give me that environment bullshit), you have come upon this instance:

A long light at a busy intersection. Traffic backed up to the point where you have a 3-4 light wait. Suddenly, some dickhead approaches the intersection on foot. By some moronic pavlovian instinct, they press the button without looking at the intersection or waiting to see what will happen. They stop, they look, and realize the traffic is going nowhere near their path of crossing, and they cross.

Then in addition to these rediculous long waits, thanks to the lights never being tested for inappropriate (aka waste of my fuckin time) wait times, a subject for another blog, ALL the traffic sits and looks stupidly at each other while the walk light blinks and not a soul is visible crossing. Everyone waits because inconsiderate FUCKHEAD didn't want to take 5 seconds to assess the situation and be thoughtful of all those trying to get home from work.

Next time you see one of these assholes pressing the button AS they fuckin cross, don't hesitate to say something to them for doing it. I have made a big deal about it on 1-2 angry occasions, one time being a very drunk passenger in a car combining it with threats when the hippy flicked me off. Then I got out and pushed him down to the ground, but that's another more delightful story...

The moral: Be considerate of people, and don't even press these walk buttons until you have been waiting at least a few minutes to cross. Or an even more terse moral: Don't be an inconsiderate asspipe.

Your kid is not so smart, stupid.

Who is sick and tired of hearing the following:

"My kid is an A student!"

"My kid moved up one grade in reading!"

"My kid has been on the honor roll for 2 years now!"

Whoopity fuckin doo Pittsburgh people. The fact is that with grade inflation rampant and kids not being challenged, ITS NO ACCOMPLISHMENT TO DO THESE THINGS!!

38% of kids are reporting A averages. That doesn't sound so bad considering that less that 20 % are reporting D's and F's combined!!! Talk about skewing the in grades to A's, B's, and even C's!!

I know EXACTLY what problems are in our school systems today. Among them are administrations and teachers who bend over when a parent gets angry and threatens the loss of their job. As an untenured faculty (aka I could ACTUALLY get fired if I hit on a kid), I too enjoyed the congo-line buttbanging by parents, and had to do a little asskissing when I lost my temper. If a parent was upset that I gave their kid a C when they "should have had an A", I had to march right down to the principal's office and address the concern. Sounds like being in school for me all over again.

Your kid is not special, and making them feel like they are not a dime a dozen (like most of us REALLY are), helps them work harder to accomplish things. If they think they are "owed" things because they are "special", they never will work hard for anything, and be surprised why they NEVER make any real money, and are divorced by 24.

I'll make things easy for you. Here are some major accomplishments your kid should reach before I want to hear about how great they are:

-Don't even fuckin mention grades until your kid is at least a junior in college with a 3.5. Anything below a 3.9 in high school doesn't impress me or most people who see alot of high school grades.

-They don't get into a serious brush with the law. Stuff like underage drinking and simple assault are barely crimes, more like "rites of passage." You can exclude those when considering this rule.

-They don't knock someone up before they plan on it.

-They actually get a job out of college that is competitive, not one of those bullshit financial jobs that every resume gets an inquiry about.

-If they are a guy, they show me a picture of the girl they are banging and I say, "nice..." and mean it.

If all these are not in effect, don't talk to me or anyone else about your kid. I couldn't care less.